I'm having trouble seeing what there is to discuss. There is no way she's moving back there with you. I don't think she can stop you from moving back there right now. Her letter sounded like she is trying to accuse you of all the things she's done, irrationality, making decisions based on emotions.... She projecting her actions onto you.
I'm thinking that to protect yourself, the lawyers are going to be the way to go. I would not be surprised if she gets a lot less in that deal than she expects. She might find out you've been pretty reasonable all along, and she's been able to go along for the ride. It might be time to get everything on paper, before you lose any leverage you have. I guess my answer is that you need to know what's what, and probably need a lawyer to get that pinned down. Then you can decided what to do.
