I am new here and just read most of your story. I am really sorry to hear that you are going through this. I myself am trying to figure out LRT/technique going dark. I think that quote might actually be from one of my posts--me quoting DR.
I noticed something about what you've been saying.
Maybe it would help to differentiate between
being nice--> interact more --> more nice --> more interaction
and
interacting --> tostada confronts/participates in OR talks --> W runs away/spews nastyness
Can you do MORE interaction, less confrontation/OR talks??
Can you use a dimmer switch to turn down any T bringing up R stuff or even responding to W bringing up R stuff?
When she brings up ANY of this stuff, can you just not react, or gently change the subject? (Even if every fibre of your being is screaming inside, "W, you are not being fair, why are you hurting me???")
Because it seems like the non-"R Status" interaction is working for you!! A lot!! But the R talks are NOT.
It sounds like she wants to get away from the pressure, whether or not she wants in the end to get away from you. Remove the pressure so she can be around you.
I think at this phase we have to create more options for our partners than yes/no, move in/move out. We have to take the pressure off them as much as we can. Because if there is pressure, they will run away, not even necessarily b/c they don't love us, but because they can't deal with the pressure!
Just remember, so many of us would do ANYTHING to be in your position. There are many things about your position that are negative, this is true. But oh my goodness! Your W still lives in your house! Use every friggin second of interaction to show her that you are strong, handsome, calm, amazing Tostada! Even if inside you are more needy and desperate feeling than you ever imagined was possible. No pressure on W!
