Maybe because someone you trusted deeply violated that trust deeply?
All of what you described feeling is very "normal," whatever that means. Venting here is good. I remember when I couldn't talk anymore to people in the real world because they were tired of hearing it. Sometimes they didn't even believe it.
Two weeks is the blink of an eye. You're going to take as much time as you need to recover, whether you want to "schedule" that time in or not. Spewing the anger on him won't do much except to give you a very temporary feeling of satisfaction. Waiting to get the apology could be a very long wait indeed.
There's a lot of acceptance in this stuff. We have to accept the WA's choices to leave for their "new life," but we also have to accept that it's painful for us. We have to accept that we'll get through that pain in our own time. All of that is natural, even healthy. It's part of being human.
We have to accept that God is still with us in this.
It's a lot like the 12-Step recovery programs, where the first step is admitting powerlessness over something. We are powerless over the ways our spouses or former spouses treat(ed) our marriages.
You will have better days. Count on it.
Thanks,
Joe
My sitch More importantly, Light A Million Candles
