Venting, journaling, cursing...whatever you want to call it.
I don't know if it was the increased drama or if I felt I had something to prove....I don't know. I wanted and needed sex! My intentions were to iniate, rough him up a little for my needs...a revenge or anger f*ck. Satisfy my need for a while and hopefully relay a message "Think about this the next time you entertain thoughts of sleeping around..or..or..did she, can she f*ck like this" I made sure the room was all dark, I was pissed and didn't really care to see him...this was for me!
Damn-it! What does IC do? He turns things around and with the heightened senses of touch due to the darkness, makes the sweetest love to me that I haven't felt in years....F*CK!!! I want to...no I need to feel anger towards him for my own sake. How do I do this when he pulls things like this?
I ended up siliently crying myself to sleep..not out of hurt, or anger, but because for the moment...I'd never felt so loved! Throws a whole new wrench into things.
