thank you friend, I have not told anyone else the whole story, no one will ever understand as the great people who support me here. I think you are right, he is horribly guilty and anxiety is eating him alive, he keeps going for long walks/drives, at my sister's at Christmas he felt uncomfortable, he told me he had this heaviness right above his heart, a tightness, didnt' feel well, went for a walk and got lost for 40min, he wouldnt' have found the way back to my sisters had I not gone out there (drove around 2x also) for the 6th time calling his name (I actually feared he'd done something awful to himself).
About his job, he's actually a great artist, there is a chance he could work as the dept.'s sketch artist, that would be so great, he is so talented.
I have been on this rd long enough to know that picking the story of the A apart is mostly to satisfy a morbid curiosity than to promote healing, some answers made me very angry and he prob wished he hadnt' said anything. ---------- Focus on your strength and let him focus on his weakness --------- yes, he has to find his own way back to the good man he was and can be. Thank you so much for your words, I really really need them.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
