The more I think about it the more confused I get.. it's just WEIRD. H and I had a really wonderful Christmas together. But I was excluded, completely, from his family. No cards, gifts, pointedly "not" invited to their get togethers. He never put his ornaments on the tree.. it has all of mine on it, but no topper (we always put that up together; he didn't mention it, I didn't want to bring it up). He will bend over backwards to NOT ask me to get or do anything (i.e. I'll ask if he needs anything from the store on my way out the door, he'll say no, then go to the store himself to pick something up a few hours later). When I think about those things, I almost feel like he's slowly shutting me out of his life.
And yet.. again, Christmas was really good. He has totally cut off both EAs (or so it seems) - he hasn't said that direcctly but he no longer texts either of them, comes home right after work, tells me where he's going and who with when I don't even ask, etc. Lots of kisses, hugs, compliments... and he talks more about the future. Not years ahead, but weeks and sometimes months - which is much different. He talks about racing more again and is excited about a new car he's getting. He talks about "us" going to those upcoming races together. When I look at THOSE things, it feels almost like he's "trying" again - that same way he was trying before when I didn't see it but he was clearly doing a lot of processing in his head.
I'm not obsessing about it, just getting it out there as it's stuff that's rattling around in my head.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
