Thanks so much L for the well wishes and being so pleased for me.
You sound like you are a lot happier to me than last time we spoke and thank goodness it looks like the ow is out the picture for good, I'm so pleased. He's saying ILY first too!! hooray!!!! I know how much you longed to hear it from him, it must feel fantastic. How is your S doing? still taking photos?
My little boy seems to get sweeter by the day and he's really excited about having a brother or sister. Every day he says its taking too long and he wants it to come out now bless him. He's only known for 2 months but 5 months is a long time to a 3 yr old!!
I've had to struggle quite a bit to stay on the DB track since I've been pregnant as my hormones keep trying to turn me back into the old me. I succeed for the most part but luckilly even when I don't DH has now realised that a lot of what led up to him leaving was down to hormones and is now far more understanding. He tries just as hard as I do and if we do argue I get really upset and scared he'll leave but he says we will NEVER get to that stage ever again because he knows what it is like and will do anything to prevent it!! It is such music to my ears to hear him say that.
I'm going to have to go for now I get tired so early these days but I'll check in when I can - its so lovely to hear from you again and know things are still heading in the right direction for you.
Have a fantastic Christmas with your DH and DS L xxxxx IP
Hi, everyone, I hope ya'll have a wonderful Christmas.
Today is my birthday, and H seems even more like he is coming around. He brought me flowers this morning, TOTALLY unexpected. This evening he is cooking out for me and taking us to look at Christmas lights. I have gotten a few more ILY's said first by him. I have to say it does scare me a little, because I have a hard time trusting anything he does, and don't want to get hurt by him again. But, I have to enjoy the good stuff, and put the doubts out of my mind. Well, Merry Christmas to all, especially to 25yrs, Althea, jak, inpain, cat, all of you who have helped me so much this year, without your encouragement and whacks on the head, I would not have made it through so far. Love, L
Well this morning, I found a receipt for some jewelry. One was a necklace H got me for my birthday, one was a necklace he got me for Christmas, and then there was a third one-a gold heart necklace that I don't know who he got it for. I have kept the receipt, just in case, but I am not saying anything for now, unless he brings it up, which I doubt. Maybe he got an early jump on Valentine's Day, or maybe he IS still in contact with that slimy leech.
I did ask him this morning as he got ready for work if he thought we had saved our marriage, and he said I am trying. And I asked if he still wanted out, and he responded by asking me if I wanted out, I said no, then after a minute I said do you? He said what? I said do you still want out? And he said no.
I send him a note each day in his lunch, and today I sent him one to make him think, hopefully. And I ended the note saying that I am the one who will always love him.
I mean if the skank went back to her H, then why would MY H get her a gift? Unless that was a lie, because she knows he's married, and she knows I don't want him to leave me, so they could have dreamed up this elaborate lie to fool me, because these ow are so devious, as long as they get what they want in the end, the end justifies the means. Even if it takes years.
Okay, I know I am just thinking this all out here, because it could be that he got this necklace for me for Valentine's Day, and put it away. I mean the one he got me for my birthday is a starfish, because of the beach trips we take each year, and he even said he wants us to go there in the winter sometime. The other one is a journey necklace, I guess because of the "life's journey" we are on together. But the heart necklace-for me or the wh*re??? If he is and has been making a fool of me this past year, I am going to be so angry. I had started being almost happy again with our sitch, but now I have to wait and see, and the waiting as always will feel interminable.
Well, I needed to get that out, it makes me feel calmer, now I am going back to bed for a couple of hours.
24th was my birthday too. Hope it was a good one. Hope Christmas was good also.
Im sorry about the receipt but, wait and see if Valentines day produces it. If not than i would confront so that he doesn't think that he got away with something if he is suposed to want to work on M, then baqck off and be distant and see how that goes and make more time for you and what you want for you.
I feel that when trying to piece you start to loose your GAL activities a bit and it is easy to slide back to the old ways. It is something you need to consistantly work on.
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
Hey jak, I totally agree with you, I have been backing off somewhat my GAL activities, and need to do some backing off of him, and let him start to wonder about me. I do think he has gotten too comfortable with things.
I will do that, and keep still about the receipt, until at least Valentine's Day, and see if that happens, then say, hey look what I found.
Isn't that something? Christmas Eve! We have the same birthday!! We cooked out, and went to look at Christmas lights. Christmas day was good, wopened presents, then had a while to relax before we had to put on a huge burst of cleaning to get ready for faily to come over, but H was at least less resentful about having to lend a hand this year.
How was your birthday, and Christmas?
I am going to be more distant with my H. I actually started it this morning, and he noticed, because he seemed more talkative, he gets that way when I seem less available.
I am going to get a cell phone soon, Yeah, I know, I keep saying that, but I really am, so we can talk.
Hi L glad to hear you had a lovely birthday and Christmas. Sorry to hear about the receipt you found. I agree with Jak about waiting to see if you get it for valentines day and then ask him about it if not although I will hold you in the upmost awe if you do this as I'm not sure I could wait that long to know. I hope and pray that it is for you as you really deserve this nightmare to be over. Maybe you could have a look round the house to see if it is hidden somewhere if it starts nagging at you too much??
Hope you have a great New Year - you doing anything for New Years Eve???
