Theoden is correct. The outstanding question here is, are you willing to make significant changes in your life? For a lot of us, the answer is (surprisingly) "no." The reason being is that many here feel that a LBS shouldn't be the one to make the changes, it should be the WAS. We feel that, at the very least, we should not be expected to be the first to change. We didn't cheat. We didn't commit adultery (an act that is considered universally unacceptable in every single culture across the globe). So why is it up to us to put in all the work while our spouses re-live their teen years?
Like Theoden, I, too am not a person to whom my wife is attracted. In my situation, I am (at best) the "less painful" option. And for your situation, at the very least, you should be in this position (and I think that you are now, which is good).
You stand for an intact family. You stand for what is best for your girls. Continue on this path, but take steps to protect yourself, emotionally and financially. You can do this. We are here to help.
