Had a pretty good holiday, considering. Spent Christmas with W and her family. But my W would not go to family Christmas Eve party. Her family was dissapointed and so were the kids and I. Every year we would have a big party at our house and everyone would stay till 12 or 1am. She went out to dinner with EA/friend and his ex, I think. Although she did tell me she was over at his EX's till late...And EA/friend and Ex don't usually hang out together. But they have two kids and my W has been trying to change hime lately(stop drinking, be a good father etc.) I am trying not to ask my kids any questions. But she has been over at his house quite often this week. Before I took the kids Christmas Eve my one daughter wouldn't kiss her goodbye and I tried to help my W by telling D14 to give her mom a kiss and hug. W started to cry so I came over to her and held her and I whispered to her that our D14 still love's her and that she was still a very special person to me and that if she changed her mind and came to the party we would like it. She responded well and held on to me for about 10 seconds or so. But she never came that night. When i brought over the kids to open presents in the morning we were running late so I called. She was miffed and when we got there she was across the street with him and his kids--in her PJ's. I don't think she was there earlier but I don't KNOW anything. I am trying so hard to ignore these things but it is VERY tough. But after looking around the house and realizing she wan't there, I asked one of the kids to run over and get mom. When she got there a few minutes later I said good morning and gave her a good long hug and said Merry Christmas. She held on for a while and I cut it short. But it was nice. I am trying so hard to believe her that this guy is just a friend but I go from feeling I'm a fool to thinking maybe she is just a EA and she doesn't realize it. Anyhow, we had fun opened gifts, made breakfast and ran to her folks. She kind of stayed away from me most of time there but I had fun with everybody and the kids enjoyed it. Before I left I hugged everybody goodbye and saved her for last. She gave me a very warm and long hug in front of everyone and whispered "Thank You" in my ear. It was so nice to hold her for those precious seconds. So I'll take it! Now I am getting nervous because the Holidays are almost over and she may start pushing for a D. I kept telling her I wouldn't talk about it during the holidays. We had takled about an amicable divorce a month ago but I have decided to stand for the marriage. So, any ideas on what I should do if she brings it up again??
H 42 W 37 M17 T20 years 3 daughters 11,11,14 seperated 11/26/07 EA neighbor/ moved in w/ him 2/8 Filed for D 01/08 finalized soon
