The Long and Winding Road...

[bhopeful]

I let my dogs sleep with me last night since I knew that waking up this morning was going to suck. It still sucked, but they didn't let me lay there and wallow in misery. I gave them their Christmas presents and they were really happy, so that brightened my morning up some. Then I took off for my parents house.

It seemed strange being at my parents without W. Everyone seemed a little sad, or maybe that was just me projecting my emotions onto everyone else. Also, family picture time was not something I wanted to participate in this year. I don't really want a reminder of the Christmas where my W and I are separated. Other than that it was actually a pretty good day.

I called my W when I was on my way home like I told her that I would. She was sleeping and was feeling sick, but she still said that I could stop by. When I got there she didn't look so good. I got a hug though. We talked for a while about family stuff and what we got for Christmas. I stayed for almost two hours. It seemed like she didn't really want me to leave, but I had to because of the dogs. I got a couple more hugs and a kiss or two. I know this is against DB, but I had to try for a little Christmas miracle. I told her ILY as I was saying goodbye and I got and ILY2 right back. Not quick enough like it was just a reaction. I think that she meant it. I tried to get her to commit to doing something later this week, but since she was feeling sick I didn't really push. We'll see if anything comes of it.

While I was at her place her dad called me to thank me for the gift cards that I got them. We ended up talking for a bit and it was really nice. I called it right when I said that he was uncomfortable because of my parents when I saw him at the Christmas play. He apologized for not talking to me more. I told him that I understood. Right after I hung up with him he called my W. He didn't know that I was at her apartment. When she told him that I was there he asked if we would come over to their house. Her parents must still like me and miss me. That feels good.

One more thing. W wanted to call my parents to thank them for the gifts that they got her. She was scared that they would be mad at her and yell at her on the phone. I assured her that they would be nice, so she called. They had a short but pleasant conversation. I think this was a positive accomplishment in my situation.

So overall, Christmas was pretty good, all things considered. It obviously could have been better, but I know that it could have been a whole lot worse.

Peace,
B