Wow I feel like I got hit by a semi today. As if all the emotion I'm experiencing just hit me all at once. W made a picture calender of the kids for me as a present for xmas. I just broke down and crying as soon as I opened it. Right now I just feel like such a failure. I feel like I failed my family, my kids for screwing up the M. I should've went to MC when she asked for it. D*#n John Gockman for writing in his book that most MC are quack! That got stuck in my head and I ended up refusing to when we still had a chance.... Yeah I'm just having a really bad day.... The holidays are just whacking me hard.... Plus I've spent almost 3 days taking care of the kids all by myself and staying at the house while the W has strepp throat. So I'm getting really attached to them even more and it's getting pretty emotional for me....
M: 31 W: 31 M: 7 T: 8 S:4 D:2 Bomb dropped: too many to count or remember, 12/17/07 last one S on 9/2/07 W sent off D papers 12/31/07. Me trying to live life and hope she returns one day.
