Still trying - Not very well

[saffie]

I nearly let OW wreck my M AFTER the A was over because I couldn't get her out of my mind. She wasn't in my H's - she moved into mine

be careful you don't let your own insecurities ruin what you have got - it's so easy to do but very understandable. In the crisis period you just focus on getting your R back together and the OP out of the M. Piecing is SO hard.

(((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))

[Heimlich]

Hang in there, Limbo.

Is the words he spoke to OW something you can talk about in dialoguing?

Don't jinx yourself by expecting the worst to happen. Really, what do you have to lose by closing your eyes and jumping on faith that this time he is being straight with you? If he's not there for you, OK, you'll always know you gave it your best shot. If you keep holding yourself back now and it subtly pushes him away, could be something you'll always regret. Risk for hurt and pain exists both ways. Only one gets you what you've been working for for so long.

BD

[limbo]

Thanks Heim,

I am really trying, I don't want to push him away.
I am looking to the new year as a fresh start, putting this hellish year behind us and moving forward.
Sometimes the hurt bubbles up, and its hard to put it back down.

[Heimlich]

Put on some Elvis and dance a bit

Oh baby let me be
around you every night
wrap your fingers in my hair
and cuddle me real tight
oh let me be
(oh let him be)
Your teddy bear

Don't forget to curl your lips when you sing along

Hang in there. Have a scratchin (preferably without hair).

BD

[limbo]

First off, wanted to say that I hope that everyone has a wonderful Christmas!!!!!


H and I dialogued last night, and talked about moving into a new year, we both said that we will be happy to see the back of this year, H told me he is really happy, and happy to be moving with me into the new year.
I told him that I still worry, about the upcoming year, and said that I worry about him, and his will power, he told me he doesn't worry, and that I shouldn't worry either, he handled it really well, and said that he know that his actions and time will help me feel more settled.
So it looks like we are going into the new year much better then last year!!
So I will believe that we will be ok, and put the rest in gods hands!

[limbo]

Hello All,

I hope that you all had good Christmas's! And santa was good to you all!

My christmas was very quiet, just us and my Mum, I did all the xmas dinner, and did a good job if I do say so myself! Its the first one I have done on my own! I know at my age you would think I had done more, but we have always gone between parents, so never had to!!
This xmas was 100 times better then last year! H was truly with me this year and it was great, gave me a lovely card, and wrote that he thanks me for staying with him for the last year, and that he loves me very much and is looking forward to starting a new year with me!
So it looks like we are off to a good start for 2008, and I am not going to look at this in any other way then what it is! I believe that H feeling are true and no one else is any longer involved.

[saffie]

Limbo,

That is a wonderful post to read. You deserve no less.

[ediemarie]

Hi Limbo! I saw you posted on FA's thread, I just wanted to swing by and say Hi. I'm glad to see things are going so well. Isn't great to look back and see improvements? Keep doing what you are doing!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

[limbo]

Thank you Edie,

I truly has been a journey and I hope that we continue on the path we are right now, because it make for a better life!

When I look back at the past year, wow, how did I do it! I have found strengths that I didn't know I had.
I think back to last new years eve, and really how horrible it was, how at the time I really didn't think it would work, and I think about the days that followed, what a mess my H was, and what a mess my life was!
But here I stand at the beginning of a new year, my H is by my side, and this time he is truly with me. I can't ask for anything more.

So I wish you all a wonderful new year, and I hope and pray that it will bring you what you want!