Relational Equality vs, Relational Equivalency

[Burgbud]

(blackfoot) What is going on with you BB? Im curious if your still filling your 401k for your WAW.

Heh. "No" on the 401k. I'm not one to use a hundred words when a thousand will suffice but here's the nutshell: laid off July '06, got a new and better (with one caveat) job August '06. Thus, no longer paying into 401k (also, covered kids but not W under new company's health insurance). Last March W tells me she's going to file for disability. After much soul searching, I decide to change from 50/50 custody to having the boys with me every other weekend and seeing them once during the week. That was predicated on the fact that I work 50 miles from where they (and I at the time) live with horrendous traffic between the two locations, so it seemed the best use of parental resources. Later it turned out she wasn't eligible to file for disability.

In September I had my lawyer file for D after no movement on the issue by W for months and months despite continuing assurances she wants to get the D as quickly as possible. Last month I moved much closer to work and W got a job. Her job requires some weekend duty so we're changing custody to where I have the boys either on a 2 to 1 weekend rotation or 3 weekends a month.

W's behavior consistently reaffirms that I'm much better off now. I've got an interesting story about when she miscarried OM's baby in May (ever seen a human fetus?) and many others. She seems crazy but she just lacks the ability to handle more than moderate stress constructively. The boys tell me she and OM broke up last weekend (which would put an end to a 32 month long distance R). I don't think that will change anything. My desire is that nothing will change, except maybe she'll expend some effort in coming up with a mutually acceptable property settlement/custody agreement and we'll be D sooner rather than later. If it goes to court, it will probably drag out until June.

Being away from her has been the best thing for me. I'm not convinced that the two of us being apart has been the best thing for the boys, but it's possible. They've both become incredibly proficient on their guitars during this stretch, which amazes me because I'm so crap at it.

As for the rest of this thread...everyone knows that genius is rarely appreciated in its own time.