Hi Tipper, you're like me. Read and register and lurk for a long time and finally post! I hope you get some help here to your story.
My thought is that your H seems to come and go as he pleases and you let him. Do you remember that if what you're doing isn't working then change it? don't keep going down cheeseless tunnels?
After this amount of back and forth with your H I think you need to set some boundaries, but only if you think you can stick to them. If you can't stick to them then it's useless. What can you do to change what isn't working?
