sandi, it seems to me that you're going to have to take some of these things into your own hands. Like the taxes. Can you get the info together yourself? The dog? Put an ad in the paper, or contact a local animal shelter. As for the cars, take it upon yourself to find out what their status is and take action.
You're being driven nuts because you're keeping yourself powerless, waiting for your H to do the things to make you feel comfortable. If something bugs the crap out of you, and the other person is not doing what it takes, what other option do you have? Take action yourself. It's your house, too.
Years ago, I lived with a guy who took a very casual attitude toward bills. He usually didn't pay them until he got the second or third notice. I always went to pay our rent in person on the day or the day before it was due. It was very important to me that the rent be paid on time. One day, on the day the rent was due, I just could not make it, so I asked him to please pay it that day. Did he? NO. Of course not. He didn't see what the big deal was. If I wanted it taken care of IN THE WAY I WANTED I had to do it myself.
The alternative is truly to blind yourself to the eyesores, and just let him handle it his way-- or not.
But eating yourself up because he isn't doing what you want in your way (granted, your way is the grown-up responsible way) cannot continue for long. Do what works! If what you're doing isn't working to bring you comfort and sanity, do something different, kwim?
Don't worry about a "pity party," just get crackin!!
