Good point. It is a pickle because to give a reason is also going to be translated into shifting blame...And I won't do that either
That's nonsense, IMHO. If, God forbid, you killed a guy in a hunting accident, you and everybody else you know would for damn sure be on the witness stand trying to demonstrate that it wasn't premeditated.
I'm not trying to compare your incident of infidelity with an accident. All I'm saying is, all explanation should not be equated with an attempt to shift blame, and I would be amazed if Miss IC didn't feel the same (of course I can't speak for her and now might not be the time, but eventually .....) Nothing *excuses* it. But the circumstances matter, as does your thought process and mental/emotional state at the time. How are either of you going to learn anything useful from this if you don't delve into the whys and wherefores, *honestly* and exhaustively?
Pain suffered without any increase in wisdom is a sad waste.
And, Mr. Depths Of Hell .... watch that hairshirt.
Chin up.
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
