This is probably going to be a very unpopular thread and I'm not calling anyone inparticular out on this, but I've witnessed something occuring on here that is disheartening to me.

I've been lurking on here for a couple of years. I've used these boards to help save my marriage and while it's not perfect, it is now good. I continue to come on here to use what I can to continue to improve upon it. I've seen lots of newcomers come and go, all in hopes of finding something to help their situations. Some stick around because they've formed a bond or friendship with people that they feel they can trust with their problems and get guidance and support through their troubled times.

I've seen a lot of charismatic, intelligent, charming, intuitive, humorous, empathetic, good hearted and caring individuals come and go. Very rarely do I see one come along that possesses all of these traits as one...the whole package.

I'm not condoning what IC did. It was wrong, he knows it was wrong. He came on, like many before him, to be amongst "friends" to seek guidance, support, a knowing hand on the shoulder. And basically for the most part, what he received was a treatment similar to how lepers were treated in biblical days.

I've seen a man, struggling to come to terms with his own limitations in his marriage, struggling to come to terms with cancer. But yet he comes on here with a deep heart and tries to help others in need. I feel his evident pain for Karen as he tries to comprehend her situation with her husband. I see how he has chased Red around on different forums, trying to calm her & reassure her that she is good enough for her husband. I see the personal crusade that he took with Real Journey to try to help her and her husband. I see a man with a empathetic concern for all that come on the board, even if he doesn't have any advice for them. I see a man with fears and insecurities of his own cancer treatments, drop them by the wayside to help ease those same fears of a little girl and to help ease the burden on her young mother.

Who else on here was intuitive enough and cared rat's azz enough to feel that something was not right with Corri and her posts? A woman I can tell that IC admires and looks up to...I think his words were "cyber-hero" Why does he do this stuff? Why? Because he is a good hearted, Good man that cares! A Good man that made a mistake and I feel he is being abandoned by the ones that he once considered friends because of that.

My heart goes out to Miss IC and she knows what kind of support she will get from me and certainly from others on the board. I've had the pleasure of talking to both the IC's via e-mail since this whole incident was revealed. What wonderful, kind & courteous people they are! Miss IC is hurting as can be imagined, but she still came across as being a strong, open, kind, sweet woman and is trying her best to hold her head up and handle this with as much grace and dignity that she can muster.

IC came across as being just as kind and courteous. If two people ever deserved to be together, it is these two. I hope they are able to see their way through this. They have something special that most of us here can only hope for.

I feel for IC. Yes he did something very wrong and almost unthinkable, hid it, and then revealed it at a very inoppotune time. But at the same time, I have to stand back in awe of this man. We all come on here seeking advice on what we can do for our marriage but yet many of us don't get it. We drag our feet and basically, to use a man's terms, don't have the balls to act. We're basically content to stumble along in our pathetic marriages, dragging our spouses down with us because we're to afraid too act upon things that may improve our situations. Too afraid to go through the rough waters to find bigger and better fishing grounds, we're content to not out grow our little ponds of marriage...that may or may not eventually dry up.

IC came on here seeking advice, got it..and had the guts to RUN with it to better improve his relationship with his wife. I remember IC receiving a link from Corri and within days, acted upon it with Miss IC and if I remember right..."OMG " was her response.

Why am I on here defending IC? He's a good man and he is a MAN. A man that knew that in order to get to the better fishing grounds with Miss IC, that he was going to have to cross the hurricane laced waters...even if it meant his boat might capsize and him drown.

Blackfoot, your post to IC felt like it was an attempt to berate and belittle IC. Something that you seem to be good at with your condescending remarks about women in general, all the while hiding behind your little shield of whatever. I'm going to be the first to stand up and say that IC is twice the man that you will ever be. Blackfoor, there is one thing that I will give you credit for and that is your comment about IC and his flirting, other than that, thank you for the material to line the bottom of my birdcage with. I'm a woman and I took IC's flirting as being so blatant that it was humorous and a joke for him...after talking with both of the IC's, I know it was! NOBODY stepped up to their boundaries and said that they were uncomfortable with IC's comments. They even went so far as to play into it with him. His post about the lingerie was thrown out there as a joke...but what did some of the women on here do? They played into it and flirted back by revealing their choice of intimate wear!!! And now they are coming out of the wood work as seeming offended...hmmmm? Nothing wrong with what they did, just be careful when casting your first stone.

IC, after having talked with you, I'm very impressed with your reasoning. I hope you stick to that and not try to turn things around onto Miss IC. I'm a hunting woman myself and I would hate to have to hunt you down ;\) I've taken down elks and bears, so I know I can take down a Nugent loving Michigander Hang in there...both of you. (((((the IC's)))) Don't act out in haste. When you two get through this like I know you will and if you're ever in Wyoming, look me up. I'll be in touch.

- Cheyenne