Corri I am going to use you and Mojo M's as examples, because I know them so well, and becuase you ladies are such good sports.
\:\) If you dont like it please say so.

Before I do, I will say (and please remember this) there was more to your sitch's, and I am NOT blaming you. OK?


He took one dancing lesson with me and learned enough to wing it when we went out. Of course, I usually planned the night out, asked him to dance, and was generally the one responsible for fun and frivolity.

What I see here from the picture you paint, is a man did something for you. placating. I wont even conjecture if he had a good time or not. So essentially he loses by doing something that you wanted too.
Asked him to dance. Would you say that you or he was the more experienced and confidant one -in this situation?

You being the one 'responsible' for fun and frivolity, did he by any chance have areas in the relationship he was responsible for, like bread winning or other areas that he planned? Was that an unfair division of labor?

And that whole FUN thing has nothing to do with if/when you have sex (it's more like a hope, not an expectation...)
So at the end of the night of dancing laughing drinking, and rubbing up on you, he wanted to have sex.... with his wife. That is an odd expectation. I guess.
Sounds like a test. To me.

I have another example from Mojo's thread that I want to grab and *hopefully* give ideas on how a guy can change the dynamic.