Its like going through withdrawals yourself. You let things be cause this is his choice. Mine made his. He has to want to work on it too to work. In your case doing all the work is sorta making you the scapegoat for all his problems he is facing. No job. Doing other things that isn't in yours and his best interests. He has to see it for himself and not blame you for it all. He is probably majorly depressed and only he can get help unless you put him up for 72 hours watch in a hospital. He doesn't do these things cause he hates you or that he doesn't want you but he is so mad at himself and his life he is/will take it out on you for the moment. If he had a job and everything was honky dorey he wouldn't be acting out like this.
Hang in there. You will feel better in time. Make yourself busy and make a plan on what you will do to best protect you and your children and to be able to make a living. Write the steps to get you there.
