I'm sorry I have not responded sooner. I only have a minuter here, since I am busy with all things Christmas right now, but wanted to say thanks to OldTimer. What you said was not easy to hear, but I feel you really honed in on a dynamic that goes on in our house that is probably pretty difficult to pick up on without being here. It is pervasive and it is how we have begun to talk with each other. Yes, I guess I do have issues with being critical and liking things my way. Saying "that's just how I am" is sometimes just not right. Without pointing the finger, he has many issues with how he communicates with me and all I've come up with is that we both have to TRY and it is not natural for us, but when we both pay attention to how we talk to one another, how defensive we choose to be or not to be, it makes a world of difference. Right now, we have a bit of extra money and have been buying for ourselves, our kids and friends and family and have been experiencing a bit less of the "don't spend any money for the next four days" thing, which is SOOO stressful. Also, I continue to initiate and he is doing more romantic things for me. I initiated the other night and then again later that night! The second time, I focused on me ;-) and "shouted it from the rooftops" so to speak. :-D
Ok, my kids are begging me for snack and we have errands to run but wanted to say thanks I'm trying to pay better attention to how I talk and act.
