In your case, I would suggest that the only 180 should do is 180 MPH to the nearest divorce attorney, and get advice. I think the annulment option is a good one.
Many of us sat in the exact same position that you were in, only you found this board, and the rest of us didn't. Consider yourself blessed and with the opportunity to truly change your situation.
By the way, if you do listen to the board and go see an attorney, you better know going in that your wife will probably react by giving you whatever you want in the short term. Long term is a different deal and if you decide to stay, you are going to have to think about it long and hard. The "D" card is not one that you will be able to play often without all sorts of other issues coming up after that. I suspect though that the reason for the change is that your wife didn't want to get married or had some other unresolved issues and is now dealing with that through withdrawal, depression, or something along those lines. If so, she may inwardly welcome the opportunity to make a clean break.
Good luck and sorry this is the way it is.
PF
Me; 42, W; 43 M; 16 yrs S12, D9
3/13 - "I want to move to XYZ City (four hours away) and it might be without you, not sure" 5/13 - "Not sure I meant that"
