I wish I could post some really wonderful words that will lead to all the answers for you. I'm sad that you're feeling down...you've been kind of ambivalent about all this for a long time, and I can certainly understand the need to detach from the frustration of everything settling back to the ho-hum-status-quo when the opportunity for something truly great is just around the corner. (I fell that way too sometimes.)
You've put so much of you into this for so long, and you've turned it over to Heavenly Father--maybe the leap of faith is in being able to keep your hands off it and have patience that things happen in His time. It's been a long time since I posted this list, but I come back to it often when I feel frustration that H's choices impact so much more than just today and I wish he'd get it all together already!:
1-I believe I am divinely inspired. 2-I believe I will always do the right thing. 3-I believe God will provide a way where there is no way.
