GGG- What it means to me.

[MJontheMend]

Do you need help finding reliable help? Just emotional support?

Thanks Corri. The thing is it's not like I'm not generally a competent person in this area. If I was on a reality show where I was a stranger who had to take over my situation and fix it, I could do it. It's just that there is so much emotion attached to the process in the form of lingering fusion. OTOH, I feel like I would have felt if my sister and I shared a messy room and my Mom let her go out to play while I had to stay in and clean the whole room by myself. OTOH, I feel kind of abandoned, although I guess I usually just kind of project this on to my daughter and get sad thinking about how she might feel abandoned by her father. It's like I focus on the "in this relationship." part of my 2bx's exit line "I am not willing to play the part of the stereotypical man in this relationship" and imagine some other better family for which he would be "willing". OTOH, it brings up feelings of I must be a loser to have been married to and actually "in love" with such a PAL and the proof of this is the fact that I haven't dealt with this mess appropriately.