That's just what I'm saying. Your mother liked your BF. I would probably be LD if I let my mother pick my BFs.
He is the only guy I've ever been with whom she knew before I did.
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Also, waiting until date #x to have sex is a rule a parent would make.
Could be... but I made that comment when you asked how you could keep the dopamine/R chemicals at bay. Postponing sex is a good way to do it, at least at first. Just so you know, that isn't a rule I necessarily live by. It was just a suggestion.
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It seems to me while you are having all those sexless dates you are necessarily repressing your ability to judge whether you are sexually attracted to a man while you concentrate on other factors mostly related to security.
Well... if I"m not sexually attracted to a man, I don't really worry about security issues, and it's not very likely the dating will last very long. Though... sexual attraction CAN develop, so it seems a bit hasty to dump someone immediately if there is at least one thing I find sexually... intriguing? I explore. Isn't that what dating is about?
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I, of course, have the opposite problem. I want to be sexually attracted to men so right away I start scanning away for anything sexy about a man which necessarily causes me to be more sexually aroused and round-heeled. If I can't find anything sexually attractive on date #1 I think it would be cruel to go on date #2 with the guy and lead him on. If I do find something sexually attractive on date #1 then I am horny as heck thinking about it by date #2.
I see what you mean. But I'd say, then, that my 'trust' issues are more a problem than my mother or security or sex. I have to have a very solid sense of it before ANYTHING. And that is something I sense from a person... it probably even gives me the feel of a lioness, because there is a part of me that is very wary.
