Time for honesty & truth for a new beginning pt 2

[sgctxok]

Ok i need help with the next issue i have, I have to tell my parents, how do i tell my parents, just say oh yea, he told me less than 24 hrs before he was scheduled to leave and spend xmas with his family in fla.

You don't have to go into details. It works against you and makes everyone miserable. You don't need to say he told you at the last minute. Just say, 'this is the best thing for us right now'.


H did say i need a vacation also. I told h i want to go but not alone.
Now, i am confused to say the least, i want to go but not alone. I would like maybe my mom or dad to come but not sure if they would, and don't want to spend 10 days with mom. Do want some time alone

You need some girlfriends. And that would shock your H.

But go alone if you don't go with a girlfriend.

Going with your parents or trying to get your H to go or not going is MORE OF THE SAME. Here's a chance to intrigue him.

I would rather us work on us and if we get moving in the right direction i would rather go somewhere like mohegan sun casino for like a weekend. ....THat is where we need to maybe start



This is where you'd rather (and we'd all rather ) start....but it doesn't usually work this way.






B ear, get 'work on us' out of your mind. That drives most spouses away faster than anything. You just bui ld the relationship through actions. Very little with words for most. The 'fulfilling' relationship talk may or may not come....b ut probably not for awhile.

You also want to work to ensure that any resolve you get sticks.

There is no doubt that you have to change your dance with him, and make it a lasting change. It isn't just a phase that he will pass through and come back. It is INTERACTIONS BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU that have to change. And you change that by CHANGING WHAT YOU DO. That automatically changes what he does.

If you do the same thing you've always done...he will do the same thing he has always done.





For instance....when you went off on him most recently, he was nice to you, b ecause he wanted to keep you calm, b ut he was dodging you and didn't want to tell you about this trip.

You need a real change that you make stick.