I have again recovered quickly.. I'm in a good mood.. I see this as him buying her off. If she goes for it.. all the more reason I need to distance myself.
I think not getting angry was a good 180 for me. It's also something that I would've done in the past. I would like to be able to react better (act as if) in the future. I guess I just wasn't in the right mindset for that today.
Mark.. you are absolutely right. I'm wondering what her coworkers are thinking? I'm sure she gloated..
Wow, I love that you bounced back so quickly. I'll be coming to you for bounce back advice from now on!!
And yes, sometimes we have to sit back and watch. If you got involved right now, did some persuing, it wouldn't be good.
I still am beyond amazed OM walked around your kids birthday party...without any kids there!!!! And now she shows off gifts from him. Coworkers want to know where her pod is parked as well..
Now.. this thing looked like a Wedding/Engagement ring. One of those interlaced deals. I asked where she got it.. she stammered for a minute and gave me a shy little smile and said "OM".
Ooooh Jar...you're playing her game. Why did you even ask? Even though you retained your composure, I bet she was tuned in to your reaction. All of the flirty stuff you and she have been doing just shows her that she can have her cake and eat it too.
Maybe now is a good time to take the space ship out a few light years.
Yup... spaceship is being pulled waaaaay back. More financial issues.. she gave me the wrong account number, so her Child Support is now stuck in limbo. Of course you can guess whose fault it is.
Anyway, we've been back and forth all day... not pretty.
Evidently she is going to borrow the amount from her brother and I just have to pay him back.
As an aside.. I took D5 to the Dr's for her contagious viral infection. The Dermatologist put some liquid on it and we have to go back in a few weeks. He said it should take care of it. While killing time between that and D5's kindergarten, I took her to a local Jewelry store to pick out Mom's Xmas present. The man kept pointing out the "Journey" necklaces and the "Past, Present and Future" necklaces. For one, I got her a "Past, Present and future" necklace.. she broke the chain and has never worn it since.
2.. this is from the D's.. not me. So.. D5 picked out a chain with a little diamond heart. It was about $160, which I think is fair.. 80 per child. Probably a little overboard, but I'm glad I didn't go with the "Mother's" ring.
D5 was ecstatic to pick something out and have a "secret". She then started to cry when we got in the car as they hadn't gotten me anything. I reassured her that it was OK. I asked for her to make me something (she is VERY creative and loves to draw and write). I honestly could care less if they (or she) gets me anything. I just love spending time with them. I'd rather the D's make me something so I know it truly came from them.
That's why I let D5 pick out Mom's present.
For the Anniversary 3 days later, I was thinking a "Thank You" card. I want to thank her for our beautiful daughters. I don't want an Anniversary card.. not at this point.
So what happens if you get back together? Do you subtract the months astray or separated from your "time in service?"
If we were to ever get back together, I would want a "re-dedication" ceremony. Maybe it doesn't make sense, but it does to me.
Oh yeah... nut... that was the "bad reaction" I was speaking of. If I were truly on the right path, I would've not even mentioned the ring... or just said "cool" when she flipped it around.
I did notice a smile of satisfaction on her face when she asked if I was mad.
Tomorrow the girls go back to Mom's until Xmas eve morning. I will take the long stretch to go out and have fun.. get my shopping done and try to meet some new people.
I'm not necessarily lonely, but I would like to have a female to talk to. Need some external validation.. probably not a good thing, but it is what it is. I've taken my lumps on this go round and need a little boost.
I think after the New Year, things will be MUCH different. I can rest assured that certain things will be taken care of. The last few "negative" glitches will be removed. Once that is done, I think all kinds of paths will open.
I don't think having some female company would be a bad thing. It might help you truly detach from your W. Maybe she is still able to push your buttons because you are lonely.
We all need a certain amount of external vailidation--we are social creatures. Don't beat yourself up over it. If we didn't have that need, the species would have died out.
So.. tonight was the night her Mare was to leave. She found out her mom sold her for half of what she said. Her mother is a real peach. I just talked with W.. she was crying.. just validated how much her mare meant to her. I know OM hates horses, but I'm sure he's being super sweet as well.
Anyway... again.. her choice, not mine. She did put a buyback clause in the contract and they are local, so she can go see her when she would like.
