You might be missing something, depends on how much you've read... Seems like you got the stupid conversations in the dark part down though. \:\)

I think for me the main concern is not whether or not he wants to be my tackling dummy. I'm pretty sure he does, and I can handle the rejection if not, i always have, but I kinda feel like he's playing games right now. Like when he wants it and pursues me, i better be ready to go, but if he doesn't really care he's going to 1)test me to see how i respond or 2) throw something in my face about how i used to be or how i used to feel. I know where those comversations go and I really don't want to go there in the middle of the night. I know how to make it happen if i want it. There have been plenty of times in the past that I could get him to change his mind about not wanting to, i just had to give it a little extra effort.

here's how i feel if i break it down a little... here i am, pushing what i feel comfortable with to try to give him what he needs and he's getting mad a me for the way I'm doing it. I don't know. I just don't get that. I would just as soon stop trying and let him do all the initiating, then just go along with him.

I could try that tonight. See how it goes. I just have a hard time trying to be agressive with him now because I'm really not into it and he seriously has an issue with the lights. not sure why, but he does. and I always wear something nice to bed, or nothing, so its not like i'm up to my neck in flannel... hehe

let me see... page issue... i feel like we are in different books right now and I keep trying to jump over to his when i see it open, but then he shuts the book and gets mad because I didn't jump fast enough.... \:\)

If i can't fall in love... I'd like to fall in chocolate! ~ Author Unknown

ann