I've come through pretty much the same journey and come to similar conclusions as you. I stopped investing in my W, demonstrating my commitment, love and support and respecting her individuality, which is so important. I also lost sight of many of these things in myself, without ever realising. One day you wake up and the damage is done.
To my W, I am very sorry.
Max
Me 36 W 37 Bomb (Easter 07) Sep (WAW July 07) "It's over" (end Oct 07) T10.5 years, M2 (before bomb)
