What was the last thing I wrote to you about the obstacles you would face? Go back and read my last post to you because you just ran face first into the two biggest ones.
Pride & self-righteousness.
And just so you know, you don't get to decide what you "deserve" for the way you acted. YOU are NOT in control of the way your wife feels today due to your previous actions over the years. You have no say in the culmination of all the feelings she experienced while being married to a drunk. Step down, jab. This can get ugly if you don't open your eyes. 2 months of sobriety is a hell of an accomplishment and I am proud of you but really, you're just a dry drunk at this point and there is much work left for you to accomplish. If you let yourself get hung up on what you "deserve" you might as well move yourself into that apartment lock, stock and barrel because you will not be going home.
