This is on hell of an emotional rollercoaster ride. I do not know why I can't stay positive and just follow the DB principles. I do not want to give up! I just want her to try. I know I know I can't change her, just me. I will keep working on getting a life and will do my best to stop R talk and quit being unhappy around her. I am having a hard time breaking my old habits. I DO NOT WANT TO BE CONTROLLING OR SELFISH ANYMORE!I NEED TO BE MORE PATIENT!!GRRRRR I wish I had more friends to talk to sometimes......
Married 13 years Me: 43 W: 39 D-19 D-18 D-13 S-25
Wake me up Bomb: July 1 2007
Wife Ring off: Jan 8 2008
-Time Is my Friend? -Put your Trust in God! -Pray lots! <------<<<
you have us mrarow. this takes time. i was where you are 6 weeks ago. keep detaching. pray constantly. never give up. you can do it.back off. be strong.
m-54 w-44 children-4 bomb-sept 21 2007 t-21 m-20yrs bomb-sept 23 2007 divorced but not giving up hope, not yethttp://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...rue#post1224023
We all know how you feel. We've all been there, or are there now. Craig is right -- you have us. When you need to vent, come here to vent. We can help you through this, as can your faith, if you are the sort of person to have faith.
It is easy to get discouraged, and only you can say when enough is enough. But we all do learn patience...Lord knows I did, and I need to. And I learned how to really try to see things from the other person's perspective. It's easy to get discouraged because we live in a society that is constantly shoving instant gratification at us. When we don't instantly get what we want, we move on to something else. We are not taught to learn to see things from the long-term, just the short-term.
Hang in there and come here to post and focus and vent.
I am tiring to hang on thanks IA. I got a hug tonight as she went out. Said she would come and say goodnight when she came home? I said that would be nice and she went out shopping with a girlfriend. I listened a lot today again about when she brought up her counselling appointment and what she said about our R and did not react for the most part. She only has one more visit with C but has not really seemed to help at all. I must be patient I guess......
Married 13 years Me: 43 W: 39 D-19 D-18 D-13 S-25
Wake me up Bomb: July 1 2007
Wife Ring off: Jan 8 2008
-Time Is my Friend? -Put your Trust in God! -Pray lots! <------<<<
I know it is very hard to be positive this time of year.but you have to take baby steps. try to remember things that make you happy. That don't include W. Turn on some music and get lost in it. Smile at a stranger just because. It will make you smile. I know this is all very hard to do. I find myself getting lost in my thoughts all the time and they never seem to be happy ones. I wish I hope I cry and none of this is helping me. I try to find little positives. Like this one is corny but I smile at the fact that right now i don't have to watch Star Trek. H always watched it so I would go do something else. (of course i would rather watch it and have him here) But right now i don't so I try to put a positive spin on it. It's tiny but maybe you have something like that you could smile at. it all starts somewhere.
Anyways, i am here for you and am sending you hugs!!!! Write lots, it does help. Even if is looks like a muddled mess, better here than out your mouth to W.
Take Care of yourself!!!!!
Me:32 H: 34 T: 12 YEARS M: ALMOST 5 S: 8 D: 4 S: 14 (OTHER R) SEPERATED: 03/09/07 (but wanted to work on it) NEW SEPERATION: 27/11/07 (doesn't know what he wants) MOVED HOME 12/01/08 I'm acting as if this blue sky is never going to rain down on me....Sara Evans
Woke up crying and missing her so much!! I just want to go up and cuddle and hug her. I feel so alone and depressed being downstairs and alone. I will have to be strong and suck it up go to work and try and be positive. I pray today mite just be a better day and she may start to wake up from her illusions about other Man. She is just so adamant that this is over and she wants out. This is killing me inside!
Married 13 years Me: 43 W: 39 D-19 D-18 D-13 S-25
Wake me up Bomb: July 1 2007
Wife Ring off: Jan 8 2008
-Time Is my Friend? -Put your Trust in God! -Pray lots! <------<<<
Blew it big time!! went up and climbed in bed upset with her asking for hug and compassion and received anger and rejection!! She is very angry says I am messed up and need to let go. I am not doing well.........
Married 13 years Me: 43 W: 39 D-19 D-18 D-13 S-25
Wake me up Bomb: July 1 2007
Wife Ring off: Jan 8 2008
-Time Is my Friend? -Put your Trust in God! -Pray lots! <------<<<
And I learned how to really try to see things from the other person's perspective. It's easy to get discouraged because we live in a society that is constantly shoving instant gratification at us. 
When we don't instantly get what we want, we move on to something else. We are not taught to learn to see things from the long-term, just the short-term. 
