Still hopeful for some pleasant surprises

[SirPrizeMe]

Good advice, Baltoman. Waiting for the holidays is a good idea. I want to make this Christmas a good one for them, with lots of gifts and lots of time with cousins and aunts and uncles, although I know that they all want to see their parents "lay down the weapons" and get back together.

Also I agree that her affair is my business. It is something I disapprove of, strongly. It's just that there is not much I Can do about her behavior.

About moving back to that house - I have an alternative approach I am working on - almost the same. Tell me what you think.

The financial reality is, we cannot afford the house she and the kids are currently living in. I just cannot afford to keep paying for it. The reality is; We need to sell that house. Now. We *can* afford the house we moved out of, across the country. The area has a much lower cost-of-living, and in fact the mortgage on the old 5 bedroom house costs about as much as rent on a 3 br condo in our new area.

Let's see, I could live in a cheap 3 br condo (complete with a "parking slot") in a new neighborhood, among strangers. Or, for the same money, I could live with my kids, in the house we designed and built, with a garage, a neighborhood park, schools in walking distance, old friends and siblings nearby.

I'm thinking I want to move back *there*, get the kids back into that house, get them re-enrolled in their old school there, change my job, and invite W to move near us. We'll be near old friends, my siblings (their cousins), near W's parents, near W's siblings. We'll have a better financial situation, and so on. Surprise! She is not happy about this!

I don't know how practical this is, I haven't spoken with my attorney. But it is the course I am pursuing.