Things are quiet (for now) on the H front. H said that he started his meds for depression. He called Thursday night after the storm was over (he wasn't able to make it up do to the roads) to see how s15 made out with the snowblower and I told him all was taken care of.
He said he had gotten out of work early and was teasing me to come down to see him. It was midnight and I had work in the morning and the roads were bad....so I politely said I couldn't. I don't know if he was drinking or if it was the medication but he fell asleep while talking to me on the phone.
Friday he called me at work to say he wasn't feeling well again. He had some errands to run and then was going to wait for d12 to get home from school. We made small talk and once after I said I was hungry and was too cold to go out for lunch...he apologized. I asked what he was sorry for (because it was an awkward time for him to say I am sorry) and he just said "i just am."
That was the last I heard from him until noon yesterday when he had called again to say the meds were bothering him and he was going to be laying down until work. I asked if he needed anything and he said no. He was going to see how he felt over the weekend and check with the dr. He did tm from work last night that he was feeling better.....so we shall see.
We had some ice overnight. D12 is supposed to have a swim meet today. Not sure if that will be happening or not. Not sure also if H will be coming by. I guess it depends on how he feels. Not sure what he is taking but it hit him hard.
Snodderly, as far as the MOW...you are right she has far too much power over my thoughts. Part of me is so paranoid. I don't know what H wants. For so long he has professed his love for her. She pushed him into filing, tattoo, earring. She lied to get him. Now does she still want him? Did she push him to meds when noone else could?
H doesn't talk about the status of their R. He is very secretive. She has not filed for d and I don't know if she will. I will try not to think about her....so much.
Anyway, still not sure what we are doing for Christmas. We always spend it with h's family. H's parents went to florida. Probably to get away from the stress of our situation. SIL1 has Christmas Eve party and SIL2 has christmas day. H has not mentioned a word to me about either. The kids are so looking forward to it. I pray he says something soon. I am waiting for him to ask because it is his family.
So that's it in a nutshell. I am wondering what you all think about depression meds and the mlcer. Will they help? H also is in counseling. Goes again tomorrow. Not sure what is going on there either.
On a brighter note, the house looks great for Christmas and I have about 90% of my shopping done. BIL in Calif. sent the kids money to do their own shopping and d12 and I went last night to buy for cousins. We had a blast. Not sure when s15 will go as he will be tied up with swimming through saturday and next sunday and monday will be a zoo at the malls. Oh well.
Thanks for letting me journal. Feels better to get it out here than to keep it in my head. I just wish I knew where H was at in the crisis and if there was any hope. MY FEET HURT FROM STANDING SO LONG!!
