I know what you're going through. This past summer, I discovered that my 47yo wife was having an affair with her 29yo personal trainer. I confronted her, and she denied it, but I persisted and ultimately had to expose her to her family, the OM's family and our own children before she would stop lying about it. I even had to PLAY AUDIO of her in order for her to stop the denial.
I had my doctor give me two anti-anxiety/anti-depressant meds. One was a long-term one, which you take every day and it takes a couple of weeks to kick in, but it really helps you "even out" and get thru the roller-coaster. The other was something that I was to take only as needed, as I had had a couple of panic attacks -- one when I witnessed my beautiful wife meeting up in a parking lot with the OM, getting into his POS truck and driving off to his house.
Ugh.
The point is, there's nothing wrong with using medication to help you get thru this -- even Glass, Harley and several other authors on infidelity recommend it. It helped me a lot, and fortunately I only needed to take the panic ones about three times.
I also lost about 20 pounds from not eating. You're going to have to FORCE yourself to eat something, morning-noon-and-night, even if you don't feel like it. Because this is going to be hard enough, without your body being weak. Remember, food feeds your BRAIN, too, and you need that organ more than any other right now.
It sounds to me like you had a TREMENDOUS day (I know it doesn't feel like it) doing all of the things necessary to protect yourself. I too had to open up a second bank account and all that, but you do what you have to do. There are simply too many stories out there of what people will do when the brain chemicals run amok. After all, an otherwise intelligent and sane adult astronaut drove across the country WEARING A FREAKING DIAPER for the man she loved.
