Power struggles are like voodoo, it only works if you believe it. I other words don't take the bait. If you feel "put in your place" even a little bit the struggle goes on. The fact that you hate it says you are still in the struggle. Just let him win.
short--I really like the way you put that, and it is lesson I too need to be reminded of.
Sun, what a weird ride home...do you think he was really lost, or maybe in a blackout. The sudden nastiness, combined with the getting lost, could mean a blackout. He has been such a heavy drinker for so long, he may have passed through his high tolerance stage and has slid down the hill to where he has very low tolerance for the alcohol. That would mean that very little alcohol changes his personality and even puts him into a blackout. Just a thought.
OTOH, I find that my XH has started to get defensively argumentative over odd and small things...a new thing for him...so maybe it is just another stage of MLC.
At any rate, I'm sure you know better than I that the only recourse you have for your resentment is to pray for him to have happiness. I start my prayer for the SOW with "Dear God, you know I don't mean this, but I'm going to pray it anyway..."
I still say that sometimes, taking the high road is not all it is cracked up to be.
