hmmm, sort of my sitch this year, I became a new person but still my H had a 2nd A because he wasn't really happy, perhaps it is something of the sort in your case, that no matter what we did THEY where unhappy still. I venture to think that perhaps your H, much like mine,has many issues and is unable to create a healthy connection with you or with anyone for that matter. Someone on the piecing forum mentioned how, to heal a M you need two healthy individuals, perhaps 2yrs ago your H was just not fully ready nor able to give it his all. In a way I sort of understand, after years of neglect my H now is still unable to fully trust me (even though he was the one with the As) for so long I was not what I should've been in our M, and now he just doesn't believe. Still is sad though, that your H/my H hold grudges and not able to let go.
Yes, it is highly unfair, but for your own good, you must let go of that negativity that's eating you. We can't do anything to make them change their minds, to "make" them understand that all we want is a happy family and that we want to do our best, we can only change ourselves. Sure it'd be nice if we could have a cooperating husband, but that's not the case, and it is what it is and we must make the best of it. You can be happy with just you and the kids, with the time you have with them, avoid bitter thoughts and comments, concentrate on you.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
