You were all right...unfortunately...

[bombardier50]

Okay, so I did it.

I told her that I thought her relationship was a lot more than just friends, that it hurt me deeply and was disrespectful of me, and I told her I wanted it to stop.

Her responses included: "What, you mean I can't have friends?", "I think you have some serious insecurities.", "I haven't had sex with anyone but you!", followed by a rehash of all the things I have done in the past that have hurt her, blah, blah, blah.

I said:"Look. We need to resolve this or it will tear us apart. We both deserve to be happy. I prefer to live my life happily with you, but if that doesn't happen, I'm prepared to find happiness without you. I think our kids would be devastated if we can't find a way through this, so I ask you to think about them."

She said:"I think we need to go to counseling."

I knew I didn't want to go to counseling, but I didn't feel like I could tell her no. She would use my refusal as an excuse. So I said: "OK, fine. But I think we need to do some individual work with the counselor before we try to resolve our problems as a couple." She agreed. And that was it.

She is working tonight, so tonight I will confront the OM.

So, wise people. How'd I do?