Cato3 said it well as have others. Don't over read, you're driving yourself crazy. If you send the letter, and a lot of it was fine and honest, lose the part about him not acting like he's separated. Sorry to say, but we don't know how he's acting when he's not around you. Also lose the comments about how the week was so hard "(at least for you") because it's sarcastic and unecessary. Make sense? The thing is, YOU need to act as if you are separated and moving on. For so many reasons. Remember above all else that you are modelling how to handle deep blows to the heart, for your children. Be strong, for your pain is not fatal nor is it eternal.
He may feel he needs to break in the single life gently, easing off family like an addiction. Only his "freedom" and its' cost will bring him around, if that. Let him have the holiday without you. Believe me, it won't be the same and he'll wish you were there at least some of the time. IF they call then that is when you'll be the fun woman they miss. Let him see the boys miss their mother. No one is unmoved by that. Don't complain about it or play the pity party or try to guilt him. Most men resent the hell out of guilt inducers. Let him go, or at least, act as if you are. You have no choice right now. The best thing to do and the thing most likely to bring him back, is to move forward in your life making the most of it, as if he is gone off to South America for 3 years and is unreachable. WHen he calls you, stay focussed on the co-parenting and the business R, b/c that's all he says he wants.
I think his note was heart felt and that while he wants to be single, to find something "more", he knows you're a good woman and he does care for you. These are GOOD things, not bad. Be "grateful" even for the 1% of what he says or does that is kind/sweet, like the flowers. As my DB coach said "Applaud loudly for that 1%" even if it's the most minimal thing. Lose all expectations....
Give him time and space and work on yourself. Good luck, j-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
