Nicely put. And when H left he clearly signaled the latter. Yuck. If he had chosen for former before he jumped ship, we might not be where we are today.
Well, although GP and I have parted ways for good reason, the man did have some relationship wisdom to share with me. One day as we were driving along and he was feeling up my thigh, he said "You know that the reason your H didn't want to touch you wasn't because he didn't find you attractive. It was because he didn't like you." Sometimes we don't like the person with whom we are in a LTR simply because they are such an accurate mirror of ourselves. The need to flee can be a need to no longer look at oneself through another's eyes. You H knows that he failed as a man when he abandoned his family and the fact is that he knows that you know. You can't will yourself ignorant but here's a question to ponder. Let's say it's a year from now and your H has met another woman and he is telling her about that incident in your marriage, do you believe that she would believe him if he told her he was truly sorry that he took that action in his life? Does he trust himself enough to earn the trust of someone other than you? If so, then I think that you should give yourself a chance to forgive him.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
