Separated and hating it.

[Jen1967]

My telephone coach recommended Men are From Mars Women are From Venus. I know it's an old book, but she seemed to think it would help me where I am, and seemed to think my husband might like to read it, if he's open to it. (I did LRT for a while, now we're in a different phase, less anger, more talking. Step 1 is to diffuse anger, that was my LRT. Step 2 is friendship and more talking, on his terms. That's where we are. Step 3 is romance and dating each other. Step 4 is he's decided to try reconciling, we can talk about my needs too and consider counseling.) Anyway, the reason I'm mentioning this to you is that I'm learning a lot from the book. It says men, when in their cave, need time to figure out what they feel and think and want to say. To push them to talk before they're ready makes you encounter the Dragon (anger, or escape, by him). I have a really hard time doing it, too, so I know exactly what you're talking about. I have the hardest time backing off and letting him be silent. But I'm learning. Maybe you could check the book out from the library. I didn't expect an old book to help because I thought the info might be outdated, but it so far is good. You're not alone.