I guess I would say that my knowledge of just how painful my D was to me and to my children makes me willing to suck up the pain of a SSM. I will never cave totally. I will continue to go through periods of trying to address it but I have virtually given up the idea that it is likely to change. It will change only when my H decides he would like a sex life within our M and not a minute sooner. Am I unhappy? Sometimes but mostly not. I guess that is because I do have something to compare it to that was ever so much worse.
I don't know what would happen if I ran across my "type" and he was available and wanted me. Currently I have a co-worker who is screwing around on her husband of about 15 years. He is none the wiser but she flagrantly parades her "new man" around the office, has gone on overnight trips with him and everything. She says he is her "soul mate". I fervently believe that she is going down a road that will only cause pain - to her, her son, her husband and people she couldn't even guess would react that way. I don't think I could do it. However, it is none of my business given that I am her supervisor and she does a good job.
