We have alot in common except how your handling the OW, in my case OM.
Your obsessing over this 'friendship' and more to the point your driving her to the OW.
The more you attack the OP, the more the spouse is going to defend them. The worse you look. It is a losing battle. Friendships die over time. Become the better friend to your wife.
Every time you attack the OW, you lose.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK