All Hope is lost/Help - Part 2

[Evie]

this is an amended version:

Today is a special day and I wanted to acknowledge it in some way. We have two beautiful sons that are the result.

I haven’t said anything before because I’m trying to stabilize my emotions, but you have asked the question because you know something is wrong.

It is a really difficult week this week (well for me it is) with our Anniversary and you going away on what should be our annual family holiday, I’m really struggling this week to cope and I’m frightened of saying the wrong thing, so in some ways it’s easier to say nothing, I’m sorry if I have hurt you by doing so. You have no idea how painful it was to have to sort out the ski stuff for the boys.

I would have been a better to person to leave in the spring… I have a lot of pressure right now too cope with - You leaving, jess going away, very busy at work, busy with the swimming, our Anniversary, Christmas to plan and get through and your holiday.

Your email is an over reaction to me not wanting to talk to you but it does have some truth in it.

I want nothing more than to talk and be friends, but you sound confused, I don’t think the door is shut on this marriage yet, but for now there has to be more distance in communication. At least for now, until I can come to terms with the separation. At the moment your constant emails, texts and phone calls are not helping me make the break – which I feel is necessary to enable me to cope. Can you please think twice before contacting me, although I want to hear from you, every contact from you is painful, I’m wearing myself out analyzing your messages. I would expect and appreciate communication about urgent matters, access to the boys and business matters, but daily or hourly updates is not appropriate any more and is not helping me deal with the separation. I need you to back off and give me space to deal with this and begin the healing process.

You have made your choice, you have what you wanted. You have made it clear you don’t want anything else. You are giving me the wrong signals by constantly contacting me. You are not acting like a separated man and you are making things really difficult for me right now. I want you to understand what I want.

I hope you can understand and take my feelings into consideration. Please please don’t take this the wrong way and stop contacting me completely, I’m not being nasty or vindictive I’m just trying to survive the best way I can without you.

As you can probably tell from the above, my feelings are unchanged and if you ever need me I am here for you. I don’t want to jeopardize the amicable relationship we have so far. This just needs time.


I'm applying the 24hr rules here. Maybe I should just send it and not think to much. On the other hand I don't want to jeopadise what we have?

X Eve