When I read your first post in this topic, a shiver ran up my spine. My H had a PA for over 1 1/2 yrs. I found out after 7 mos. He told me it was over. About 7 mos after that he left, said he needed time to think, figure things out, it would only be for a short time, he just needed some space. I kept waiting for him to come home, he kept saying soon, not long, he wasn't quite ready. Turns out he was still seeing OW all along, never ended it. I found out over a year after my first discovery.
All I guess I want to say is that I wanted him home so badly that I did not see what was really going on. I allowed him to come and go in my life, put up with his disappearances, his excuses, his lies because I was afraid of pushing him away. All I was doing was making it easy for him to live two lives. I'm not saying that's what your H is doing now, but be wary of wanting him to come home when he says he's not ready. There are reasons he is saying that. It wasn't until I told him I was done, it was over and I needed to get on with my life without him that he finally ended it with OW (I think, and hope). I was serious, though, and he managed to convince me to give it another try. My LRT was not intended to get him back - I really was done.
Everyone is right, though, you really don't want him back until he is ready, and in the meantime, get on with your life. If he doesn't come back, you will survive, and by starting now, you can lay the groundwork, get stronger and treat yourself the way you deserve to be treated.
Take care.
What does not destroy me, makes me stronger.
FA:43, H:42 D:7 M:10 yrs, T:24 yrs EA:?, PA:1/06 S:3/07 EA/PA ongoing Aborted attempt to move home 07/08
