so what if you are the one to end it, on paper. He is the one who actually ended it when he said to you... "you have to be the one to end this.
Actually if I am honest with myself, he ended it when he left without a word in 2004. We were doomed after that point. I thought we were going to be different. Fight the odds and make a M work after a S, but it is really quite rare. I think once the S and D words even start to get thrown around, your M is never the same. Hard to recover.
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Say to your H... "I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you." That morally/spiritually separates you from him. And then tell him... "I am now acting as a divorced woman. That includes dating. When we can figure out the financial stuff, and when the kids are a bit older, and the housing market recover, we can make it legal like."
That is actually very tempting. We could easily live together I think. But maybe I am deluding myself. Last night he also said that seeing other people was a "dealbreaker." So I doubt he'd take kindly to basically an open M. But is that what it is? No, because I wouldn't be having sex with him. So we'd basically be roommates. The kids would benefit. Hmmm
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Boy... I'm cheery, huh? I'm sorry, girl, I just think you need to take control of your life... milk it, like he is. Why not?
That's exactly what I need to do. Take control of my life. Just need to figure out the fine details.
