It scares me sometimes how you can pin down exactly what I feel in regard to how much "control" I want my H to have over me. I am all about "control" in the bedroom, open displays of masculinity etc... Want to kill my desire? Make me be the agressor 24/7. I can be very agressive sexually but I am a whole lot happier if my agression is met with equal or more agression on the other side. If my lioness bites, she wants bitten back. OTOH - money, chores etc... I expect to be an egalitarian thing. My job, my core values, my hobbies, my friends - these things are mine and are non-negotiable.
Well, although we are on the same page, I'm sure you would agree with me on the following. Men like admiration and are attracted to vulnerability so you have to at least "let" them play you bunny sometimes. It's hard to only switch gears into a feminine/masculine or dominant/submissive vibe right at the bedroom door. Like you wouldn't say "It's your turn to change the poopy diaper. When you're done with that and you've finished the dishes, get in the bedroom and throw me down and have your way with me."
Also, it is only fair in the interest of GGG to be the clearly dominant partner sometimes and let the boy be the horny monkey. For instance, in a recent Savage Love column he gave the example of putting your high heels on a man's genitals while he gives you head. It's all a matter of proportion. I wouldn't like a sex life that had that vibe most of the time but, of course, it would work better with ordering him to change the poopy diaper first.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
