Originally Posted By: Trixi If she made a *choice* to remain married and work on creating a mutually satisfying marriage, then these financial issues wouldn't exist. Why should the savings be depleted?
Trixi, That is exactly the realization I am hoping she will have, though I don't know if I want to say the words to her. It's better if she figures that out herself.
How will she come to that realization if you are staying in someone's room and paying the bills and depleting your savings? In my opinion, I am glad if something is "painful" for her. This shouldn't be easy or pleasant. Is it easy or pleasant to have this thrust upon you? Are you trying to protect her from her own choices? That doesn't do anything for anyone. Do you see her as so weak that she can't handle the ramifications of her decisions and that you're so strong you can handle it for the both of you? If that is how you feel, then there is some other dynamic going on in the relationship that you might want to look at. (ie, parent/child dynamic.) I hope I haven't been too harsh or accidentally insulted you. And I am by no means a pro-DB'er-so take what you can use and toss the rest.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
