Pregnant and abandoned #3

[JennyF]

One thing that helps me when I fear I'm going to lose my H forever is....we have two kids together. He isn't actually going anywhere...ever. We're connected for life whether we like it or not. You are in the same boat because you're pregnant. So with all the ups and downs of his life now or later...you will be a constant regardless.

Am I doing the right thing by not calling him? He said that one of the issues was that I didn't show him the attention he needs.

I think you are doing the right thing. You didn't show him the attention he needed when you were together, he's now choosing to be with someone else...he loses that privilege.

he couldn't decide whether he should stay with me or give it a go with the OW, he told me to give him his space. I was super clingy and I think I pushed him out

It is a bit of a contradiction isn't it?? Give him space...give him attention??

I say...stop focusing on his needs altogether and focus on your own. Don't call him. Good for you for going 2 days without talking to him. You need to show him that you're independant and you don't need him. Want him yes, need him no.

I hear you talk a lot about the 'fear' that he will happier with OW and not want to come back to you. Again, remember that you are connected for life and he is not going anywhere. How can he miss you if doesn't have space from you? How can he realize that OW isn't right for him if he doesn't spend time with her to figure that out? This is one of the hardest things for me to accept because I do not him with OW (obviously!)...but if it ended now and he came back to me right away, I think he'd always be wondering what could have been with her. So I'll let it go so it can self destruct. It will...it has to. I HAVE FAITH!!!
J~