Girl you are bouncing right now... you've just spent time with everyone putting up the Christmas tree in the house that you all used to share together. So you may have had expectations for this event that didn't pan out.... don't go jumpin' ship cause they may have been unrealistic......and remember your Daughter is in the throes of hormonal explosion..... even in the best of circumstances they are gonna act kinda witchy!
You vacilate between being tired, frustrated, down, and struggling financially. Yet, somehow you always seem to finds a ray of light somewhere in the darkness. You will again! Give yourself a break and focus on something other than the seperation.
You don't want a pep talk and you don't want to be argued with... that's understandable... nobody's trying to rock your boat, you're doin' fine with that on your own.
Get a grip sweetie!!!! It's a rough time of year for families in limbo.
BIG HUGE (((((HUGS))))))!!!! you need some about now!!!
~lost
Last edited by lost-n-found; 12/11/0701:28 AM.
Psa 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
AMY, you have jumped my butt in the past for the things I have said, now its my turn! AMY, cut the pity party, get off your ass, and finish what you started! This is a bump in the road compared to what you have overcome! You are the rarest breed of person, someone who did wrong and had the guts to admit it and who has busted her ass to make it right! Don't lose sight of your goal, it may seem far away to you in your current mental state, but its a lot closer than you might imagine. If your husband didn't want you, he would have divorced you long ago. His pride is still hurt and you have to go through some more pain to get him back, but get him back you will. You more than anyone has shown me that people can redeem thier life if they really want to.
Amy, how about this, what the F*6% do you know? I am just curious as to why this hits now? Why it is a sudden hand of fate that you are coming to terms with without further discussion from those of us whom you have spent time with over the past few years?
I'm Jewish as you know Amy, so simply put, something just ain't kosher in Amyville...........
Not for nothing, but maybe a christmas where every gift takes deep thought because of your financial position this year may be so much more meaningful to your kids than you can imagine.
For gods sake woman, don't ever punt on the 35 yard line..... always go for it on fourth down........
Of all people I figure you will appreciate my efforts at a metaphor.
Regardless of your sitch and your position on it right now, you are a valued member of this community and would be missed dearly. If you do choose to leave, I for one will miss you very much and will simply wish you the best in your life.
AmyC- I'm sorry to hear this, but I sure understand. I really think you've done everything you could. And you know what, I think Jeff did too! I think that there was an awful lot of damage done, for whatever reason, and whoever's 'fault' doesn't matter! Do what you need to do! You've been agreat resource for lots of people here, but that's a gift you've given, not a responsibility you have to continue. I guess I'm just saying, do what you need to do!
After my "puny" 9 month stand, who am I to tell you to stand longer? I honestly believe you were pivotal in MY marriage restoration...and I strongly believe that God will honor your faithfulness. Why hasn't your marriage been fully restored? Who knows! When we see Him face to face...I believe it will all be clear. Until then, we have to have a strong measure of faith to keep us going in the face of overwhelming odds. I know you are weary. I agree with Frank_D that you should tell Jeff what you told us...then take a break...but, don't close your heart, sweet Amy!
BTW, I also agree with Ian!!
Hugs and prayers to you tonight....((((((AmyC))))))
Last edited by FaithfulH; 12/11/0704:55 AM.
Praising God Daily, Remaining "FaithfulH" Me: 62 W: 62 D:33 S:30 & 31 Married: 40 Years BD: Sep 2006 Piecing: May 2007 2nd BD: May 2014 Working On It: Today
Amy, I'm not one to talk. I wanted to stand but my ex shot my legs out from under me. In some ways I wish I had filed the minute he left. Who knows, it might have made a difference. Then again, I would wonder if I could have saved it....
You do what you have to do. You are in a low spot and one thing I have learned the last 2 years, the low spots don't have to last long. I do know that I long for the familiar and I am sure that is why I miss my ex more than anything. Starting something new is scary. Maybe one of the reasons we do stand is fear of new things. We want what we know.
I can't imagine going through this with kids. I am exhausted with just me and work, I can't imagine having to be "on" 24 hrs a day. I am not giving you a pep talk or anything else but I do have one question: How will divorce change your life? Will it make a difference financially? Will you say goodbye to Jeff and never see him again? Or will you want to remain friends with him and continue contact between the kids? Will you start dating? Will you move somewhere else?
My point, and I am sure you see it, is this. If a D isn't going to change things dramatically, then why initiate it now. Why not just make this into a real separation and try that first? Make a list of things you think will change with a D and see if you can do it in separation. D is expensive even if you aren't forced to go to trial like I was. It is time consuming, it is draining.
If you really are tired and want to cut ties, I get it. I remember having a dream that the trial was delayed and I woke up angry because I was ready for the D to be over. That said, I am dating and it is overwhelming. Life after D can be overwhelming.
"It is what it is." One of my friend's favorite sayings. He's right. The other one that helped me is," The only way through is through." You will get through this, you will still be you on the other side. You will wake up tomorrow, and the next day. Are you in a hurry?
hey sweety, you have been a source of much support and uplifting for many, I've read your posts throught the worst times in my life and your life testimony with its ups and downs have been a blessing to me, you have been a blessing... I will keep you in my prayers, you are an amazing person and I hope you never forget that, love you honey)))))))))))))))
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
I dont think I have ever posted to you but I do read your threads . I wish you all the best , sometimes a line in the sand has to be drawn so that we can get on with life .
I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I do want to say one thing to you, though. Your time here on DB was NOT 'wasted'. You stayed for a reason....
(((((((((((((((((((Amy)))))))))))))))))))
Check out the current status of my sitch, I had to start a new thread in 'Newcomers'. I wanted to thank you personally. I still have no understanding as to why you 'chose me' and called out an 'alert' to others to come to my aid at a critical time (I can only say it was a miracle). I think a higher power is allowing something wonderful to happen to me. YOU are part of the miracle, YOU deserve love and happiness, everyone makes mistakes, WE are HUMAN. I only wanted to thank you. I hope my situation continues to improve and I hope you find the love and happiness you deserve wherever that may be. God Bless.
_________________________ Me: 38 W: 36 R 16 M 12 2 kids: S6, D4 Bomb: 10/22/07 Sep: 12/11/07 My First Thread, My Story
you need some about now!!!