One thing to bear in mind as a Type 7 is that your H's dependency issues are actually giving you a certain amount of structure in your life. It's like you have a chronically sick child who is constantly ringing an annoying little bell to remind you to do yet another tedious task to care for him.
This is ABSOLUTELY true, and one of the ways that the "he is addicted to alcohol and the partner is addicted to the alcoholic."
Is it any coincidence that my late H had health problems that were the center of our life together. The man I dated before him also had health problems and wound up having a heart transplant. (When my H had the kidney transplant that led a friend to dub me the "Transplant Queen" ) So now I'm with a man who is a recovering alcoholic and who goes from one crisis to another. The latest crisis is that he lost his wallet. It's always something.
This means that my life is always about the other person and not about me. The other person's needs have been so "un-ignorable" that my life has wound up being about making sure he (whoever HE is) is okay.
This is the life of the partner of the alcoholic... spending years trying to figure him out. That's what alanon helps with: showing you how to live YOUR life, whether or not you leave him.
Also the Type 7 is prone to alcoholism. Any type can be an alcoholic, but addiction (gluttony, excess, overdoing) is a particular weakness for the 7.
) So now I'm with a man who is a recovering alcoholic and who goes from one crisis to another. The latest crisis is that he lost his wallet. It's always something. 