Long and bumpy road

[Startingover2]

Its been a rough few days mentally. Maybe its because I am pregnant on top of it all, but its been tough.

Heard from dh once yesterday. A text asking how I was doing and how his daughter was. It baffles me. He seems perfectly content on just being a dad from a distance. How can you tell someone you love them, but not make one change to move closer or fix things? Is it just lip service? Am I just supposed to call when I go into labor and he stand up and be there? I am thinking now that if things are still this way I don't want him in the delivery room. I should feel safe with the person that is there. He isn't my safe place anymore.

I realized I have not seen him in 2 weeks and have not personally spoken to him at all for that long as well. All communication is done thru texts. Very odd to me.

I was just watching Baby Story on tv. I cried because the dh's in that show are so supportive and loving. My labor and delivery won't be like that.

I miss him. I am scared to do this all alone.
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